Reflections

Here I sit, six months after an experience that changed my life. Since returning home, a day has not gone by when I have not thought about my time in London. Letting a day pass without some thought about my study abroad experience would almost be impossible as the trip shaped me into the person I am today. This may seem cheesy, but it couldn’t hold more truth.

When I signed up to study abroad, I knew the person that left the states would not be the same person that returned. I had no idea how the experience would change me, I just knew that it would. I imagined that after a while some changes would fade away, completely forgotten. Before leaving, I envisioned that I would come back with a deeper understanding of the world, with a brain full of knowledge of British life and culture. Although I do have a better understanding of the world and probably know more about British life and culture than I even realize, these aren’t the most important things that I took from my time abroad.

When I first came home it was difficult to express to people how I was feeling. I was so excited to be around friends and family that I had missed while I was abroad, but there was always a bit of emptiness. As difficult as it was at times living with 7 other people, I missed the chaos and the adventure that each new day held. When people asked me about the trip, I told them if felt like it was all a dream, like it had never happened. I was different so I knew it couldn’t have been a dream, but there was no other way to describe it.

I had formed friendships, one in particular with my roommate and traveling buddy, Jeana, which will last a lifetime. We had spent nearly every moment of those three months together, with the exception of her weekend trip to Amsterdam. Being separated from everyone who was going through the same adjustments I was was a challenge. With time it got easier and easier to adjust being back in the states. (It definitely helped that I had two online classes to work on that I had put off while I was in London!)

As winter break neared an end, I was ecstatic to move back onto campus and get to see my friends I had been separated from for all those long months. I envisioned the transition being an extremely easy one. I thought classes would be tough, since my semester in London was so easy, but I was pleasantly surprised that they weren’t nearly as bad as I thought they would be. Instead, it was more of a challenge getting back in the swing of things in the activities I was involved in. There just seemed to be so much I had missed and although I wouldn’t trade my time in London for the world, it took some time to fit back in.

I have always been somewhat of a perfectionist when it comes to school and my grades. A huge lesson I learned in London was that although grades are extremely important (and anyone who knows me knows I would never purposefully do poorly) they aren’t everything. Instead of laboring hours over assignments, I learned how to get them done in a minimal amount of time and still achieve the grade I desired. I believe this is what kept me sane this semester as I was completing 21 credit hours. With my prior outlook on school, I would have never left my room. I don’t know exactly what it was that made me come to this realization, but it definitely has given me the opportunity to enjoy life a little bit more.

If anything contributed to this change, it would be that I gained the self-confidence back that I had been lacking. It is amazing what just a little bit of self-confidence can help a person achieve. It all starts with believing in yourself first before others will believe in you. While I was in London, I began to believe in myself and began to dream big. After having the opportunity to see the world, I realized the only boundaries we have to deal with are the ones we set ourselves. We only have one life to live, so we better live it well.

Somehow the semester managed to disappear right before my eyes. By the time I had adjusted to being back on campus, it was Spring Break. Then by the time the craziness of the semester settled down, my sophomore year had come to an end. I was reluctant to leave my friends, as I had missed out on spending a whole semester with them, but it was time to head home and start working again.

Although both Jeana and I had full semester loads to deal with, we always managed to find a little bit of time each week to look back on our time in London. Sometimes it filled us with happiness to reflect, other times it made us sad. Many times people tell me not to look back on it and be sad, but to reflect on it and remember the good times. Of course what these people don’t know is this is easier said than done and I think difficult to understand unless you were a part of the experience. Reflecting back on the good times just leaves me longing to be back in Europe, but also helps drive me to find a way to go back someday.

During my time abroad I became open to new people and experiences that I hadn’t even realized I had been so closed off to before. Being immersed in new cultures definitely opens up your eyes to how diverse and unique the world we live in is. I am now more open to trying new things and meeting new people. You never know what you are going to like until you try it and you never know what possibilities can open up by meeting a new person. My time abroad has definitely shaped the person I am today, and I hope it will continue to shape me for the rest of my life.

I never want to forget all the things I was able to learn about myself and others while I was abroad. As the days pass and more time inches between my experience and the present, I continue to realize more and more how this experience impacted my life. London Centre Fall 2010 was an incredible, unforgettable experience. I will end with a quote that seemed to sum up the trip from Wicked, “Who can say if I’ve been changed for the better? I do believe I have been changed for the better. Because I knew you, I have been changed for good.”